Three Letter Word

I have a confession to make …

I don’t go to church.

Ever. 

Not even on Christmas or Easter … because then, that would be hypocritical, wouldn’t it?  

For those who know me, this may be surprising information, for several reasons. My children all go to Catholic schools, and I was raised as a Catholic. Then there’s the fact that throughout this blog, and really, any time I speak of Fabulous Shoe Night, I always say, “ … I have seen the hand of God so many times since starting Fabulous Shoe Night …” Because I have, and I openly, and frequently, credit God with giving me the idea for Fabulous Shoe Night in the first place.

But before I go on, let me make one thing clear … this is by no means an indictment of any formalized religion. At all. To be really, really honest, I, personally, just don’t feel the presence of God there … in church. Yet I know others do, and I fully respect that.

The irony is, as a child, I thought God “lived” in church. In fact, I remember looking around for Him, wondering why I could never see Him. Then, as I got older, I realized that I, personally, didn’t particularly need the ritual of formalized religion to feel close to God, for I believe man invented religion, not God.  To me, He’s already there, within us, around us, in every flower, behind every cloud, in the eyes of a loved one, hidden within our very souls.  I think we just have to be still to hear Him, and adjust our vision, ever so slightly, to see Him.

I feel God all around me … especially when I am doing Fabulous Shoe Night work, which, if you look at things a certain way, can be ironic … like a balancing act on a tightrope.

Why …? Because in this ridiculously “politically correct” world we live in, there are people who take offense at just about everything they, personally, don’t agree with … so now everyone has to walk around on egg shells, at least publicly.

And as Fabulous Shoe Night is a public entity, I have felt that same restriction …  the hesitation to mention God to avoid “offending” anyone. But as this FSN journey I’ve been on has been a crash course in trusting my intuition, I’d feel inauthentic if I wasn’t honest about the huge impact God has on the work we do … regardless if I go to church or not.

Our work within Fabulous Shoe Night is honoring God, whether one chooses to see it that way or not. Our chapter leaders sign on to be a part of FSN because they have a strong call, within themselves, to be of service in their communities. Whether they see their work within FSN as honoring God or not is their business, as that is the most intensely personal relationship, and frankly … none of my business. But clothing and feeding the homeless, giving money for the care of shelter animals, collecting gently used shoes and coats, donating to women’s and children’s shelters, providing wigs to cancer stricken women who can’t afford them, donating to causes such as ALS, breast cancer, Alzheimers, etc. … these are all things connected with giving, hope, helping those in need and love. And giving, hope, helping others and love are connected to God.

In this world of judgement, scorn, eggshell and tightrope walking, we need more fun, camaraderie, friendship, giving, and, yes … shoes and cocktails. FSN was created because not everyone is able to write a $500 or $5000 check to a cause they support, but, together, we can all help … collectively. And, we are helping, making a tremendous impact on the non-profits in our communities.

So the next time I get that occasional side-eye, or weighted comment, “Oh …. I haven’t seen you at Mass in FOREVER!!!” … I just smile and keep moving. For I know in my heart, and beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God and I are on very good terms indeed.

God made so many different kinds of people. Why would he allow only one way to serve him? ~Martin Buberchn

All religions must be tolerated... for... every man must get to heaven his own way. ~Frederick the Great


This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness. ~Dalai Lama

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