There is No Crying in Fabulous Shoe Night

All throughout the genesis and planning of the Fabulous Shoe Night concept, I have been eager to basically just hurry up and start helping people already. Having to wait to do so until the (boring! mundane! God-awful!) legalities could be put in place was like Chinese water torture to me, because, as anyone who knows me will tell you, I am not very patient. So I should have been thrilled and happy last Thursday night, the evening of our first fund raising event, that what I had been waiting for, planning for, wishing for all these months was finally here, right?

Nope. Not even close.

Instead I was a bewildering blend of self-doubt and certainty. I was certain … positive! … that no one would show up. Certain that the entire concept was a stupid idea. What was I thinking …?? A women's social group combining shoes and charity??  Ridiculous!! A little voice would occasionally interrupt (I like to think it was the voice of reason) and whisper that if it were truly a stupid idea, I wouldn't have so many wonderful, intelligent, busy people offering their time and talent to help make my "folly" a reality. Only problem was ... it didn't interrupt often enough. In the mental tug-of-war between self-doubt and reason, self-doubt was clearly ahead.

Sorella Boutique, here in my hometown of Media, PA, was hosting the first ever Fabulous Shoe Night charitable event. Guests were invited to wear their most fabulous shoes, and enjoy wine, champagne and appetizers as they shopped. 20% of sales from the evening would go to deserving clients of Lovely You, a shop catering to the special needs of women enduring the ravages of chemotherapy and/or radiation, offering wigs, head scarves and comfort care products … as well as emotional support. I couldn't think of a better  group to help for our first event, and my panic rose anew … I didn't want to fail these women.

The closer the hour got to the event, the more doubt crept in, all but 

obliterating any voice of reason. I needed reinforcements. I had already pestered my husband enough during the day … so I called Jeff. He has that Yoda-like quality that imparts calm and wisdom during my frequent bouts of panic. Thank God he picked up. After patiently listening to my verbal and emotional tsunami, clearly hearing the impending tears in my voice, he succinctly said, "There is no crying in Fabulous Shoe Night."  As I tried to protest, he stopped me again, knowing I hadn't really heard him. "No … listen to me. There is NO crying in Fabulous Shoe Night. People will come, it's going to be great. Just go and do it. Call me tomorrow." 

Oh … ! Well … that was quick. Humph. Having no other choice, I squared my shoulders and sighed, brushing away one last tear. Okay, then … let's do this.

Through my panic, I couldn't help but notice as I walked through the door at Sorella that the atmosphere was … festive. Char, the owner, and her staff were excited, happily relaying that they had been answering calls all day from women inquiring about the event. 

Despite my fear of no one showing up, women began to slowly trickle in, some in groups, others alone. I walked around, talking to each of them about what Fabulous Shoe Night was all about, and my goals and hopes for the future. Everyone seemed very receptive to the idea, and not a single person confirmed my fear that it was a "stupid" idea. Quite the opposite, actually … they loved it. I slowly began to relax. 

At one point I stood back and just observed, visually trying to drink in everything that was going on. I noticed something I hadn't counted on … in fact, never even thought of;  a growing sense of sisterhood became evident. There was an energy in the air that you could actually feel. They got it. A group of women came together on that rainy Thursday night to help other women, women they don't know … and will likely never meet. But we all knew we were there in silent support of these women going through their own personal Hell called cancer. We were happy to be there, and that positive energy we all felt was both unifying and unmistakably up-lifting.

By the end of the night, I was mentally drained, but feeling buoyant enough to go out for a celebratory drink with Char and my friend Patty. We exceeded our goal for the night … exceeded it. I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. When I think that the money we raised that night may help a woman going through chemotherapy get a wig instead of the head scarf she thought she had to settle for … I feel buoyant all over again. That's what we're all about. That's the spirit of Fabulous Shoe Night I intended all along … women coming together for a fun night out, all wearing our most fabulous shoes, helping to make the world a better place … unified. 

Every time I think about it, my eyes fill with tears. Happy tears.

Let's do this.